The Can’t Tell Us Nothing Podcast

Dad's New Teacup Pig Is your spouse better than a trained monkey?
Honey Badgers in the Breakroom Which city has the best reparations?

The group talks about a story of an accountant who unexpectedly became a sub-10-second sprinter at age 30, marveling at his athletic abilities and discussing how rare such genetic gifts are.Improv Scene: Accountant GamesA group of regular accountants competes in a charity sports event, only to be outclassed by a superhuman accountant who can sprint like a professional athlete, leaving them suspicious of his true profession.Discussion: Female Football LeagueThe hosts explore the idea of an all-female, non-sexy, full-contact football league, discussing how such a league could empower women and shift gender norms in sports, while imagining the potential for highly skilled players.Improv Scene: Recruiting for the Female Football TeamA football coach visits a father to recruit his daughter for an all-girls football team, discovering that the father believes he is possessed by a "shit demon" that interferes with his parenting, adding a supernatural twist to the sports recruitment.Discussion: Exorcisms and Religious ScamsThe conversation shifts to religious exorcisms, particularly focusing on a pastor named Citronelli who performs public exorcisms of "sex demons," prompting the group to question the authenticity of such events and laugh about the ridiculousness of exorcism scams.Improv Scene: Demons in the Break RoomThree demons in a break room discuss one demon's misuse of his powers, as he is caught dating humans instead of tormenting souls, leading his colleagues to intervene and suggest he attend "demon church" for reformation.

Lectures about Racists Inventors Is the Happy Birthday song fire?
Who is She? It's always about some man or woman from their past.
Uncomfortable Chairs Night Young men aren't dating, young women still are

Lose the Game, Lose Your House Are school sports rivalries personal enough?
The Drug Dealer Conference What if dealing drugs is your dream job?
Reading Minds at the Zoo What is an animal's creepiest body part?
Jon talks about a black panther nature documentary

The Woke Mafia Wokenize Every Corner The Pothole Focus Group It's not called reparations but, its basically reparations...right? The School's Right Wing Watch The Wire though. Great show. Tandiwe The Dodo How is the Mammoth this time of year?

The Russian Suite We're just gonna open a window here.
Companion Mode Would you go to a robot doctor?
The MLK Shoe Room From this side its kind of a hug, but from this side...

Happy holidays ya'll! CTUN got swept up in the spirit and decided to improvise their own Hallmark Christmas movie.
CTUN Presents: Holiday in Butternut
(We originally streamed this at Christmas time 2022)

Goblin Mode This is why we can't have nice words.
No Cake For The Tiny Man But how good are her web designs really?
Supreme Court Slow Day Was it a slow day at the Supreme Court?
Chatting about Chat GPT w Saurabh Pande Automate your bed times stories
Saurabh Pande is a Houston based performer. Before Houston he was in Chicago performing with the Second City Touring Company, The Improvised Shakespeare Company, and a house team member at the iO Theater. Film credits include The Chi, Chicago Med, and Paper Girls.